Flaming Bubble Baths!

I guess I better tell you up front that this post could be considered by some to be inappropriate, especially for young boys.  If you so choose to keep on reading (which I hope you do), please note that I am no longer responsible for any outrageous laughter, followed by 'eww gross', or even possibly some laugh till you cry moments.  PS - If any one attempts to try this trick I am not held accountable if you get injured in places you don't want to be injured (however if it works, let me know!).

Grace, Frank's mom, finishes her chores for the day. She looks out the window as she wipes her hands on her apron.  She sees her two boys, James, a teenager, and Frank, a small boy, playing with each other as they walk toward the house.  As they get closer she could hear the brothers teasing and talking to each other.   Her lips gently curve upwards, her eyes glisten with a light from inside her soul, the smile spreads throughout her body, warming her heart.

Her boys, James Morrison and Frank, open the door, step inside the modest ranch house, their mother awaiting their arrival.  She looks at the boys, covered with dirt, sweat, and fun, and orders them to take a bath.

The boys went to the bathroom (one of the lucky few with an indoor bathroom) and filled the tub with hot water, heated by the wood burning stove.  As the water level reached the mother approved height, James, being the eldest, quietly and swiftly sneaks into the kitchen and tucks a surprise in his pocket for them to play with while in the tub.

Grace hollors at the boys to quickly get in the tub before the water gets cold.  The boys gather themselves in the bathroom, shut the door, as James pulls out and holds up the 'surprise'.

James and Frank excitedly quickly disrobe, hop into the tub, splashing water as high as they could (what boy wouldn't?).  The brothers continue splashing each other getting water all over the bathroom. They don't notice the water splaying all over the walls, pooling in puddles on the floor, or dripping down the sink. All they know is that if you have to take a bath, then make it as fun as possible!

Soon the splashing becomes a bore.  Maybe it was due to the water level getting too low from giant splashes or it could be that James was starting to feel the urge deep in his gut.  Buster (James) decided that is was time to up the ante and bring out the fun!

Buster lets one rip, yes you know what I'm talking about!  He was creating a bubble bath - the only means they had was to use their own bubble making tushes!

Buster feels another one coming on.  He holds it in as he reaches over the tub, grabs the boxed surprise.  He pulls it open, grabs a match, and strikes it against the side of the box, lighting it aflame.  Now he's ready to loosen his cheeks and let it rip.  Buster holds the match ready as the methane and hydrogen infused bubble reaches the top of the water.  As the bubble bursts, there's a  brief second when the orange flame burns a bluish hue.

Frank, curious, excited, and mesmerized by this yellow flame turning blue from a gaseous bubble decides he needs to give it a try.  With every bit of concentration he could muster, he focuses on creating a bubbling sensation in his gut. His face squints together in a fierce mix of determination and intense pushing.  Buster, familier with this lemon eating look of on Frank's face, grabs the matches.

Soon the bubbles start.  One slowly comes to the surface ready to pop.  Then with a flash the yellow flame turns blue.  Just as soon as that one surfaced, several more start surfacing, popping, turning blue!

Grace, busy in the kitchen, hears her boys giggle with pure innocent delight.  She smiles to herself.  Nothing makes a mom's soul happier then the sound of her children giggling and enjoying simple pleasures, like bath time.

James (Buster) could tell Frank was getting low on 'ammunition'.  He turns his focus internally until he can feel the bubbling sensation growing in his gut.  He lights another match in preperation.  Again! The flame turns blue as the bubbles break at the surface.

This flaming bubble making would go on and on until the water got cold, they ran out of ammo, or it got too late.  Grace never really knowingly knew about the flaming bubble baths.  However gross this may be, this is what boys do and what a science lesson to boot!

This story was inspired by John Houser, Frank's son.  I asked John about one of his favorite stories that his father, Frank, told him.  This is the one story that John has the best time re-telling.